On becoming a professional.

The first semester of graduate school tested every ounce of who I am. It's 24/7 stress, with 52 of the same people, at least 12 hours of school/assignments per day, and running on empty for 7 days a week. There were times when I couldn't even hear my own thoughts, because the sea of responsibilities loomed over me like an unsatisfied itch I really needed to scratch. I went days without talking to my family. I went weeks without uttering words that weren't related to occupational therapy. There were even times where my self-care was a bit questionable (haha- but not joking). So, when I say this semester tested my limits- I really, really mean it.

Self-doubt often crept into my mind:

"You can't do this."
"You won't survive."
"You're not cut out for this."

I questioned whether I was in the right place, doing the right thing, and choosing the right career. When you're running on four hours of sleep and caffeine, you're bound to wonder what you're doing with your life. But there's a reason why I am here. And I had to continuously remind myself that I CAN do it.

Survival wouldn't have been possible without my fellow classmates, whom I love dearly. It's not often that you can find individuals you're surrounded by every single day (in times of severe stress) and still have the kind of love we have for one another. It's truly a bond that cannot be explained. And it's because of them and their support that I'm still on my path to becoming an OT practitioner. *cheesy but true*

Our professors warned us that we would feel a change- an evolution of sorts. That we would feel ourselves morphing into a professional, and we would know when it was happening. I thought this idea was ridiculous- because here I am- wearing a crew neck and yoga pants, no make-up, and hair slicked back in a pony tail, just trying to fake it 'till I make it. (haha) But it's true. You do feel yourself changing. It's a feeling that cannot be explained, but it makes it all worth it.

The moral of this story is-- I'm a better person for being in this program. I'm an even better person now that I'm on break. I shower more regularly and sleep at least 10 hours a night.

But in all seriousness, sometimes it takes a challenge like OT school-- a challenge that strips you of everything you thought you knew-- to humble you. It allows you to understand that you will never know it all, but you can surely try. So, we try. And we will continue to learn. For you. For our future clients. And for us.

Don't put limits on your abilities. Because you will exceed those limits every time. And because you CAN do it, too. Just take it one day at a time, and always remember that I am here for you-- rooting for you.


Sending love.
Kelsie